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Lincoln Movie Review: This An Obvious Oscar Mega Winner

Slavery was bad, right? So, Steven Spielberg decided to make a film about Lincoln, starring Daniel Day-Lewis. As soon as the Academy of Motion Pictures Arts & Sciences heard this bit of news they should have given the film a bunch of Oscars right away. This way they could have saved up on the ceremonies and blown the money on a Vegas trip or whatever.

I mean, Spielberg, Lincoln, and Day-Lewis? Why bother giving anyone else the false hope that they can compete against that? It’s downright cruel, is what it is. It’s like it was created in a laboratory by an evil scientist to be the perfect Oscar bait.

In any event, the movie had a surprise screening at the New York Film Festival, and apparently the audience wasn’t as enthusiastic as expected but, just as with Mitt Romney and Barack Obama in the primaries, the general consensus appeared to be that it’s going to be shoved down our throats whether we like it or not.

Here’s what people are saying about the movie:

"[Daniel Day Lewis] is guaranteed another Oscar nomination and frankly, we can't imagine anyone beating him out of winning his third Oscar, not even Joaquin Phoenix, who was so great in The Master," – Comingsoon.net

“Judging by both the events on-screen and in the room, Day-Lewis, a longtime Oscar favorite, solidified his status as a lead actor contender” – The L.A. Times

“In short, Lincoln appears to be Oscar-bait incarnate.” – The Hollywood Reporter

Oscar chances.” - /Film

Oscar” – Movieline

Oscar” – New York Post

In short: OSCAAAAAAARRRRRRGH!!!!

Some people seemed to be a little surprised that the movie wasn’t a full-on epic biopic as was expected, turning instead to be a talkey account of Lincoln’s last two weeks in office, trying to convince everyone that slavery is not such a great idea after all.

But, as I said before, this thing is getting the Oscars no matter what, so you better just get used to the idea and shut up.

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