Best Motion Picture Drama: Argo

I screamed with delight when this won, not because I think it remotely deserved it, but because I think it is absolutely hilarious that it has won. It's like the Academy moved on from this, very sensibly, and nobody else got the memo. They all seem vaguely confused by what's happening to them, which I understand. Let's all hope this doesn't happen again next month!

And that's all, folks! I wish, like Tina and Amy, I were going home with Jodie Foster, but alas, I am going to watch the season premiere of Girls instead. Which, let's be real, is not a particularly terrible fate.

Thanks for reading, everybody! It's been real. I'll have a post up tomorrow morning about what tonight means for the Oscars, so check back for that then!