Let’s face it. Americans love their pork. Where else in the world can you buy bacon-flavored candy canes to hand out at Christmas or bacon cologne to dab on before a date? Want to clean your teeth? Try bacon toothpaste. Of course, there's also bacon-scented shaving cream and if you cut yourself shaving, don't worry — it's nothing that a bacon strip band aid can’t fix.
The only thing Americans haven't figured out is bacon-infused ammunition. Until now.
Thanks to a small bullets manufacturer in Dalton Gardens, Idaho, gun enthusiasts who also happen to hate Muslims can purchase "Jihawg Ammo" rounds coated with a pork-permeated paint.
The idea is pretty simple (and sick). Point the gun at a Muslim (you know — the stealth jihad, creeping Sharia, America hating, pork fearing, terrorist kind) and shoot them until they’re dead.
But killing their physical bodies isn't enough. This ammunition is apparently so badass that it prevents their souls from reaching Heaven. According to the company, Muslims shot by the bullets will go "straight to hell."
That’s because Muslims, like Jews, refrain from ingesting pork products and many view its consumption as haram, or forbidden. (There is no indication in the Qur'an or elsewhere, however, that consuming pork will send one to hell, and even if there was, there’s a big difference between intentional consumption and being murdered by a pork bullet!)
The new bullets aren’t the first time an obscure gun company smack dab in the middle of white, conservative America has used pig products to try to deny Muslims entrance into Heaven. In 2011, Midnight Rider, a company in Courtland, Virginia, advertised “Silver Bullet Gun Oil,” which lined bullets traveling down the chamber of a firearm with pork grease. The oil came packaged with stickers that read "One shot, one soul," which were to be placed on dead Muslim bodies.
This would all sound pretty stupid if South Fork Industries, the company behind the bullets, wasn't pulling in record sales from the product. That's alarming. According to one report, more than 4,300 people have "liked" Jihawg Ammo on Facebook and one man said he planned to buy 500 rounds. Another urged the American military to sneak them into combat weapons.
It's not implausible to believe that these bullets may easily show up in the chambers of guns carried by civilians. It's also not far fetched to see how angry Tea Partiers and far-right racists who abhor the presence of Muslims — or anyone with a remotely foreign connection — in our society may actually try them out. But here's the thing: How do they really know that the pork in the bullets has prevented a Muslim from going to Heaven? They don't. But that's not their point anyways.
The point of the whole thing is actually much simpler: dead Muslims. And who knows, maybe this ridiculous Idaho company will team up with the manufacturers of these bacon coffins to ensure that this deed is really done and that death by pork bullets is followed by a burial that would surely rule out eternal afterlife.