Zombie Apocalypse: ‘Miami Cannibal’ Girlfriend Says Rudy Eugene Avoided Drugs

Culture

Celebrity and women’s rights attorney Gloria Allred, famous for participating among others in the O.J Simpson, Tiger Woods, Anthony Weiner and Herman Cain trials, flew from Los Angeles to Miami to get her latest victim, “Miami Zombie” Rudy Eugene whose supposed girlfriend Yovonka Bryant is now speaking up.

“[Eugene] was a model boyfriend who [with the exception of “one brief indulgence in marihuana”] avoided drugs,” said Bryant.

Wait, what? I though the explanation for the shocking attack in which Eugene devoured 75% of his victim's face before being fatally shot by police was the now infamous synthetic street drug “bath salts.”

Anyhow, Bryant – with the help of Allred – told journalists out of a Sofitel Hotel ballroom how the “Miami Cannibal” was a religious person whom her three small children played with and even affectionately called “uncle Beard.”

However, Allred emphasized that the reason she called the Florida press conference was to help Bryant “have a voice” and denounce cannibalism as “the great scourge of our time.”

“Cannibalism is a serious issue and is very dangerous to the health and the well-being of the cannibal and the victim," Allred said.

And the victim?

She told the media not to judge Bryant who allegedly wasn’t aware of her boyfriend’s cannibalistic instincts, since “they never discussed cannibalism or voodoo.” Allred and Bryant concluded that society must continue condemning cannibalism and that the media shouldn’t trivialize it or glamorize it.  

In the meantime, a New Jersey woman is claiming to be the biological daughter of Ronald Poppo, the “Miami Cannibal’s” victim who is still in Miami’s Jackson Memorial Hospital where authorities have been so far are unwilling to divulge any information regarding his status.