What Porn Stars Want You to Know About the Difference Between Porn Sex and Real Sex

What Porn Stars Want You to Know About the Difference Between Porn Sex and Real Sex
Source: Getty Images
Source: Getty Images

Porn is not real life. This seems obvious. Yet, due to a widespread lack of sex education and the ubiquity of porn on the internet, many young people have confessed they actually learn a lot about sex from adult entertainment.

Although the point of porn is to create fantasies in which viewers can indulge, but not necessarily imitate, some porn performers — like industry veterans Rocco Siffredi and Jessica Drake (NSFW) — are willing to acknowledge they have useful sexual wisdom to impart and do the work of teaching healthy sexuality. However, as Drake recently told Mic, ultimately "it's not porn's responsibility to educate." 

But there are a few distinct differences between the sex that happens on a porn set and the sex most people are having at home, which performers can be quick to point out. "The basic pitch I give is: Women do not spontaneously orgasm. Anal sex is not always easy. We don't fuck the pizza boy," Drake said. 

Mic caught up with her and seven other performers at last month's Adult Video News Awards and Expo (NSFW), in Las Vegas, to find out what they think viewers should keep in mind about the differences between porn and "real" sex while watching their favorite adult films. 

Here's what they had to say. 

Jessica Drake

Jessica Drake
Source: 
Mic/Getty Images

"People don't go to see movies in theaters and expect to be able to fly. They don't take things away from regular mainstream theatrical movies the same way they take things away from porn. I think it's because sex is so intimate. You see someone naked on screen, and it's something we can all relate to in some way ... It's all real sex, but it's different sex."


Chanel Preston

Chanel Preston
Source: 
Mic/Getty Images

"I equate it to sports, because it is a sport. People don't watch sports and say, 'I'm going to go try that at home, I can do that.' They like sports because [athletes] are like gods: They do things that other people can't. And porn should be [seen] the same way. Most people can't naturally shove huge things up their asses. We do prepare for it. There's a lot of things going on behind the scenes."

Moe "The Monster" Johnson 

Moe "The Monster" Johnson
Source: 
Moe "The Monster" Johnson

"The difference between porn sex and real sex is that people in porn are putting on a performance. There's going to be turned-up screaming, very high-intensity sex, pounding, sometimes verbal assaults being shared back and forth. People need to realize that when we're on set, there can be anywhere from two to 20 people in the room watching. You have to have a very strong chemistry with the person that you're working with; sometimes, you've just met this person 20 minutes ago. It's not like this is my girlfriend with the lights off. This is opened up, live, direct, cameras, lights, everything in the face. It's a show."

Casey Calvert

Casey Calvert
Source: 
Mic/Getty Images

"Difference No. 1 is that we're professionals. We do a lot of prep beforehand that you don't see on camera, besides cleaning our buttholes for anal. There's STI testing and negotiation you don't see. But also, sex on camera is inherently a performance. You have to position your body in a way that the camera and lights can see, to get the hardcore [shots] that they need to get. I don't know anyone who has sex like that at home — and if they do, I would love to know why. It's not comfy."

Joanna Angel

Joanna Angel
Source: 
Mic/Getty Images

"The main difference is that porn is planned: this time, this day, with this person and this is what's going to happen. You have two people who might like each other or hate each other, but they have to make this scene work if they want to complete their job for the day. I perform in scenes with my own boyfriend ... [but] a lot of what makes sex what it is in 'real life' is that you don't know what's going to happen."

Kelly Shibari

Kelly Shibari
Source: 
Mic/Michael Dorausch/Flickr

"If you tried to have porn sex at home, nobody would have an orgasm. The point of porn sex — well, most porn sex — is showing repetitive penetration in positions that never actually touch sexually pleasurable organs ... I would never have sex in a position that required me to be standing on my head, but pile driver is a position in porn. My job isn't to have an orgasm on camera. My job is to put on a good enough show the people watching it have an orgasm."

Ryan Driller

Ryan Driller
Source: 
Mic/Getty Images

"It's a little looser than in personal [relationships], namely given the fact that when you go on set, you know that you're showing up for, say, My Friend's Hot Sister. That's your courting — that's your approach, pickup line, that's almost the consent you're giving right there. Most performers will ask their scene partners what they like and what they absolutely don't like ... At the same time, it's also more strict for the same reasons. In some of the more hardcore scenes, there's a specific checklist, an actual contract, that everyone signs."

Jessie Lee 

Jessie Lee
Source: 
Mic/Michael Dorausch/Flickr

"You have a connection with the actors you're working with, but it's a different type of connection. You're not just letting yourself go completely. You have to make sure your face is always toward the camera, that you're always making noise, that you're turned a certain way. Off-camera sex is a lot more intimate. There's a lot less thinking going on when you're having real sex. Also, a lot of the positions aren't really comfortable; they look really comfortable on camera because we're actors. That's what we do for a living."

How much do you trust the information in this article?

Jenny Kutner

Jenny Kutner is a senior reporter at Mic, covering feminism, reproductive justice and sexual violence. She is a native Texan based in New York. Send tips or friendly messages to jenny@mic.com.

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