Are you ashamed of your natural inclination to put forth as little effort as possible when it comes to doing basic work tasks? Do you hate yourself a little bit every time you fake sick to get out of a social obligation, only to spend the night on your futon, drinking rose and watching How I Met Your Mother on Netflix?
Well, you don't have to feel that way anymore.
Because according to new research, it turns out you're totally normal: We're all just a bunch of lazy fucks at heart!
A recent study published in the journal Current Biology found that when it comes to energy use, human beings are naturally inclined to keep the effort at a minimum. Researchers from Simon Fraser University in Canada had people walk on treadmills while wearing robotic exoskeletons that would require them to exert more effort if they walked in their typical style. As it turned out, subjects were quick to adjust their walking style to a way that required less energy — indicating that our natural impulse when faced with an obstacle is to just try as little as possible.
"We found that people readily change the way they walk — including characteristics of their gait that have been established with millions of steps over the course of their lifetime — to save quite small amounts of energy," said Max Donelan, an author of the study.
"This is completely consistent with the sense that most of us have that we prefer to do things in the least effortful way, like when we choose the shortest walking path, or choose to sit rather than stand."
OMG, yes. Sitting is awesome. #TeamSitting, now and forever. Or laying, if at all possible.
Lead author Jessica Dellinger says humans should be proud that we're wired to expend as little energy as humanly possible. "Sensing and optimizing energy use that quickly and accurately is an impressive feat on the part of the nervous system," she told Science Daily. "You have to be smart to be that lazy!"
In other words, we're all just naturally wired to sit on couches and eat pizza while binging on terrible TV. So pass the remote! Pass the popcorn! Pass the gas! Let's all agree never to go out or do anything of substance ever again. After all, it's what the nervous system wants.