When faced with the emotional tidal wave that is imminent fatherhood, what is a modern man to do?
While the rugged father-to-be of yore may have refrained from fully embracing his girlish excitement around the milestone of parenthood, the woke man of today is totally psyched about becoming a dad. He's so secure in his masculinity, in fact, that he and his bros are throwing straight-up baby showers for each other!
There are just a few small rules:
1. The event must be called a "dadchelor party."
2. Invitations must be written in a block-y, muscular font and include usage of at least five of the following eight "b" words: BEER, BUD, BREW, BOWL (as in football), BALL (as in any sport with a ball), BUFFALO, BARBECUE, BRO.
3. Only masculine colors like forest green and blue are acceptable (pink is strictly verboten).
4. Sneakers are required, ironic dad jeans encouraged.
5. Men love beer, so beer should be incorporated into all aspects of the party, whether in pint glasses, "No. 1 Dad" mugs, baby bottles or just on the front of your actual shirt.
6. Suggested party activities include off-roading, poker-playing and beer (beer!) pong (see No. 5).
Getting together with your closest friends for a sentimental celebration of a new life chapter, just like women do, while still asserting the fact that you are certainly, for sure, 100%, most definitely still a man?
Guys really can have their beer-themed cake and eat it too!