This Genius Theory Will Change the Way You Use the "Pink Lady" Emoji

This Genius Theory Will Change the Way You Use the "Pink Lady" Emoji
Source: Getty Images
Source: Getty Images

Emoji lovers, prepare to have your minds blown.

There's a brilliant new theory about everyone's favorite sassy emoji: Namely, that we've been using it wrong this whole time.

Unicode, creators of the emoji app, call her the "Information Desk Person." She's the girl with her palm facing upward, next to her face. You might have used her while announcing some "exciting personal news" on Twitter.

Source: Emojipedia

Folks tend to use her when presenting information in a shameless, self-satisfied way. But Jessi Stern, 26, an event planner from Toronto, has a different theory.

What if she's actually gesturing to a new haircut?

According to Stern's theory, Information Desk Person is actually "part two" of the haircut emoji — the girl whose long hair is being cut by a pair of silver scissors.

Source: Emojipedia

Much like an evolving Pokémon, the emojis appear to represent one woman's bold style journey: First she takes a massive pair of scissors to her long, unruly locks; then she shows off her sleek new bob. Notice how, in the second image, her hair is a few inches shorter.

Source: Emojipedia

"I decided to give everyone in my contacts emojis beside their names, and it just, like, clicked," Stern said via Facebook Messenger.

Here's how it works in practice: You use the first haircut emoji to inform friends your haircut is in process. You use the second to demand they check out your sweet new 'do. 

She's still the perfect humblebrag emoji — "I just wrote a novel in a week!" — but now she's got a more specific purpose: showing off a fresh trim.

"Next time I get a haircut, I'll put them together when I inevitably Instagram it," Stern said.

Of course, the theory opens up plenty of new emoji interpretations. What if the lady in the red dress is still the same woman — so jazzed about her fancy new haircut, she can't help but dance? What if that same woman has irritable bowel syndrome, and the smiling poop is hers? Or, as Twitter user Walter Green pointed out in 2014, perhaps the "pink lady" emojis are all centered on one event: a wedding and its disappointing aftermath.

So, the question is: Could all emojis exist in one ongoing narrative?

These might be even better than Harry Potter fan theories.