Let's face it: The food pyramid was an absolute mountain of garbage.

The 1992 Food Guide Pyramid (RIP)Source: Center for Nutrition Policy and Promotion/USDA
The 1992 Food Guide Pyramid (RIP)  Center for Nutrition Policy and Promotion/USDA

This is what the fat cats at the USDA wanted us to eat — every. single. day.

Source: Center for Nutrition Policy and Promotion/USDA
Source: Center for Nutrition Policy and Promotion/USDA

I don't know about you, but nothing gets my mouth watering like knowing I have to eat three servings of "dry beans."

Dry.

Beans.

Yum. Oh wait, not yum — catastrophe.

tfw you get 11 servings of grain a daySource: Giphy
tfw you get 11 servings of grain a day  Giphy

There has to be a better way. And fortunately — there is, with the help of a not-so-secret ingredient: Sriracha.

Doesn't that look so much better?

Doesn't this *almost* make you want to eat a vegetable?

Source: Tiare75/WordPress
Source: Tiare75/WordPress

Isn't this just the most satisfying thing you've ever seen?

Source: YouTube

Doesn't this video of Sriracha being made make you want to burn a hole straight through your tongue at lunch today?

Sriracha — the simple, spicy secret to making even the healthiest, blandest food in your pantry a joy to eat.  

Source: Giphy
Source: Giphy

(Yes, even dry beans.)

Anthony Smith
Senior writer