A Chinese Love Hotel Will Use Tech to Create Your Perfect F*ck Palace

In 1958 we had the Magic Fingers Vibrating Bed — fast forward more than half a century and you can check into a high-tech automated bang room.

The CEO of a sex toy retailer is opening up a love hotel in China that taps into the Internet of Things so you can better tap that ass. 

"The love hotel we are building now will be so smart that the light and temperature of the rooms will change according to the mood and intimacy of a couple," Chunshuitang CEO Lin Degang told Forbes. 

Love hotels are a big thing: A love hotel is a dedicated short-stay accommodation for guests who want to fool around — and business is great. There are around 30,000 love hotels in Japan, the Guardian reported. And following its sexual revolution, China is seeing a growth in love hotel demand.

"The demand is there," Lots of Love Hotel marketing director Wang Ziwen told the Guardian. "There are so many lovers and they have a need for love." 

And soon lovers will be able to love all night long in a room souped up with connected devices. Modern romance, baby. 

Making love smarter: Degang's upcoming smart love hotel rooms will include thermometers that "monitor physical exchanges between guests," according to Forbes; the thermometers trigger the lights and temperature to change accordingly. We assume this IFTTT recipe will look something like: if this — bodies are heating up — then that — lights will be dimmed.

Each of the 50 teched-out sex dens will be decorated in one of 10 styles, which may include a skylight, "strategically placed" mirrors, sex toys and role-play costumes. This approach isn't that unique — love hotels are typically themed. Rooms have been stylized as spaceships, dungeons, prison cells, Christmastime, underwater and some even feature Mickey Mouse. 

But it's the "smart" features of Degang's love hotel that will potentially entice a more high-end market. Forbes reported that his first love hotel, Love Poem, which will open in what Degang calls the "romantic and beautiful city" of Hangzhou, will charge guests between $92 and $232 a night, which is similar to the rates of the city's cushy hotel Shangri-La. 

That's the price you must pay for that cutting-edge nooky.