I was following a YouTube rabbit hole of retro gadgets when I discovered MiniCuteCupcakes, a child tech vlogger who rivals the (much older and predominantly male) legends in the field.
MiniCuteCupcakes isn't here to demonstrate the processing speed of the OnePlus 3 or the resolution of the iPhone 6s. That's kid stuff. Instead, she reviews classics like the 1980s Password Journal (teal color) and the Discovery Kids Teach&Talk Laptop (pink).
MiniCuteCupcakes is the reporter our cold hearts need. Here are a few reasons why.
She's unscripted AF.
She's not about specs or benchmark tests — she just calls details as she sees them.
Referring to a laptop: "It has this logo almost, but it's a sticker. It kind of reminds me of the Apple logo that you put on the iMac or the iBook, whatever you call it, it's like the laptop thing, whatever you call it."
Referring to a USB port: "This piece right here, it's like a hole, it's for this mouse that comes with it."
She's metal as hell.
When a plastic compartment was difficult to open, her tool of choice was a butterknife.
She's fearless. "Come and hack me if you dare," her vibe seems to project. She tells you her password ("ginger").
And if you don't like her videos? Sorry.
"So that was the computer. I hope you enjoyed this video, and if you did please be sure to give it a thumbs up, and if you didn't, well then... I'm sorry."
She understands privacy issues.
During her review of the Teach&Talk laptop, she proves she cares about her viewers' security.
"If you write something valuable and you don't want anybody else to know, I would advise you to delete it before you log off the computer."
And from her Google+:
"Hey everybody! If you found me from YouTube, your [sic] in the right place! Go ahead and comment on my photos, and have fun! Remember, be safe with your personal info! :))"
She knows clicking is important.
"I wanted to point out that these are pretty easy to click."
And she makes sure to support her fans.
She took a request from her vlogger bestie SailorWinxFan and did a review of Ever After High Dolls. Shoutout to SailorWinxFan!
Sadly, MiniCuteCupcakes appears to be on hiatus. But MiniCuteCupcakes, if you're reading this, know that you could be the next Kara Swisher. Know that the tech world misses and needs you.