Leonardo DiCaprio Allegedly Vapes and Wears Headphones During Sex, Lol

Bad news! Leonardo DiCaprio — notorious modelizer and Man #17 on this Harper's Bazaar list of "The 25 Most Beautiful Men of All Time" — might be a horrible lay. 

Sad!

The person claiming to have had the bad sex with Leonardo DiCaprio is an anonymous Star magazine source "whose BFF bedded the 41-year-old Oscar winner," so definitely take this information with a grain of salt. But don't let the grain of salt stop you from processing this information, because this is information that must be processed.

Here is what the Star source had to say:

[He] is selfish, lazy and downright rude. She told me that during the act, Leo put on headphones and even started vaping! Then he signaled her to keep going while he just laid back and zoned out.

Headphones! Vaping! While engaged in the act of sexual intercourse. What a far cry from the passionate, intense, hand-sliding-down-a-foggy-car-window sex we've always incorporated into our Leonardo DiCaprio fantasies!

Whether this is a baseless rumor or not (and let's be honest — it very well might be), alas, this is a sobering reminder that Leonardo DiCaprio is in fact not Jack Dawson. Instead, he is a wealthy, famous Oscar-winner who can sleep with essentially anyone he wants to without having to worry about silly things like "giving his partner an orgasm" or "taking off his headphones" or "acknowledging that the person he is penetrating literally even exists, like, at all."

Boy, bye.

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