Tuesday night's episode of Pretty Little Liars, "Exes and OMGs," continues the seventh season's trend of surprise returns — this time in the form of Paige, Ms. Grunwald and the infamous black hoodie.
Though fans can now rest a little easier after seeing that Noel running Caleb over with his car was just part of Hanna's dream, we've got miles to go before we sleep — just like Hanna, who is having a tough time with flashbacks of getting tortured by A.D. (formerly known as Uber A). Even Ravenswood's Ms. Grunwald senses this distress, and goes so far as to show up at Hanna's door to warn her that a darkness is shrouding her and Caleb.
While sitting with Hanna in the Radley lounge — and listening to all of the suffering souls left over from the asylum days — Grunwald confirms Hanna's firm belief that Noel Kahn is A.D. He happens to be in the hotel, and after warning that the ominous threat against the Liars is "very close," Grunwald out-creeps him with a macabre glare and a serious nosebleed when he comes over to ooze his own sleazy charm.
This occult omen is more than proof for Hanna, who, after making herself seem a little nutty in a group meeting, decides to take things into her own hands. She takes off to an unknown location where she papers up the windows. Before she leaves, though, she says goodbye to Caleb — but doesn't kiss him. #Haleb fans were predictably torn up.
Ezra also takes off this week (again). In light of the FBI alerting him of his ex-girlfriend Nicole's potential survival of capture, Aria tells him about the call from Nicole's phone she deleted from his call list. Emily explains to Ezra that the "lie" was her idea, but he's still confused and upset. Proposed to his high school sweetheart a week before his undead ex comes back? Rough.
Aria tries to make peace and a gesture of faith by cashing in their two elopement tickets to Tuscany for one see-if-my-ex-is-alive ticket to Colombia. She is still wearing her engagement ring as she hugs him goodbye — let's hope she gets to keep it on.
Radley High School is also having a moment. Ali decides to go back to teaching her English class because she is broke as hell (thanks, Archer) and is greeted by her students with a disturbing throwback "A" prank: They all get to class early and wait for her in black hoodies. How very season one, kids.
Emily is also considering teaching at RHS after Principal Hackett suggests she apply for the head swim coach position. But guess who else is applying? Yes, Paige is back.
Evidently, Paige and Emily broke up (which Emily takes all the blame for) right before Paige had a career ruining car accident that prevented her from qualifying for the Olympics. So now she's back in Rosewood also thinking of coaching the swim team. As Emily points out, Paige could go coach at any D1 school, so it's rather suspicious she is now showing up in Rosewood.
Emily doesn't see any warning signs (classic) and they share a bottle of wine and reminisce. It's clear Paige is back for one reason — and she lurks outside the Brew windows watching that reason share a bottle of wine with her girlfriend, Sabrina. Bye, Sabrina: Paige is here to steal your girl.
We didn't get much farther in the uncovering of the identity of Charlotte's long-lost sibling, but Spencer and Aria did track down the now disgraced doctor who delivered him/her. The girls ply Dr. Cochran with liquor, and he reveals that he used to make all of the unwanted pregnancies and babies at Radley disappear. Charlotte was given to Jessica DiLaurentis, but her sibling, underweight but tenacious, was given to county family services. So A.D. either went through the system for 18 years — or was adopted. In other words, we have probably already met A.D.
Because Noel Kahn is far too obvious a choice and we end the episode with Spencer flipping through a family photo album, not to mention the incestuous ties between the DiLaurentis and Hastings families, it's safe to guess this long lost Drake sibling is either Melissa or Spencer.
However, Lucas' return for the final season is still a wild card, and could prove to have meant something more sinister all along. We'll most likely have to wait until the last minute of the last episode to find out, in true Pretty Little Liars style.
Up next week
A sexy Jason and Aria scene! Fan wars, commence: #Ezria versus #Jaria. Spencer finds out why she was covered in blood in the dollhouse. Hanna tries to trap Noel and potentially kills someone? Can. Not. Wait.