‘Splatoon 2’ Splatfest Start Date: Nintendo details first official teams — Ketchup vs. Mayonnaise

Nintendo won’t just let us live in peace. Not that we’re doing much of that anyway with the state of the world, but still. This needs to stop. The first official Splatfest for Splatoon 2 has been revealed and it’s going to tear us apart.

First real Splatoon 2 Splatfest: Ketchup vs. Mayonnaise

Nintendo confirmed the two factions in Splatoon 2’s first real Splatfest on Twitter. It takes place during the first weekend of August. They’re starting out with a show-stopper here. Ketchup and mayonnaise are cornerstones of western cuisine and Nintendo is making us all pick a favorite. Whichever side loses is confined to the dustbin of history and made illegal forever.

That last part is made up, but seriously, what the hell, Nintendo? Ketchup and mayonnaise serve completely different purposes. Sometimes they even go together. It’s a false dichotomy, just like ice cream vs. cake. Now is not the time to turn friends into enemies just for Nintendo’s amusement. People will just pick whichever condiment Marina supports, anyway.

Anyway, you have a couple of weeks to figure out which condiment you wish to betray. Have fun.

More Splatoon coverage

Read more of our Splatoon news and coverage, including our impressions of the open beta back in March and at the Nintendo Switch event in January. Find out everything we learned about the game back in January. If you’re looking for more information about the April 2017 Nintendo Direct, check out the proceedings here. Or if you want to check out general Nintendo Switch news see reports of screen defects in the Switch and what you can expect if you’re trying to buy one.