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My winner: Kathryn Bigelow, Zero Dark Thirty

Hands down, Kat Bigelow earned Best Director this year. It's not even...wait — what's that? Haha, no; you're kidding. She wasn't nominated? I don't...I can' is that—

Their winner: Ang Lee, Life of Pi

Life of Pi truly was a remarkable accomplishment. If house cats can run YouTube, then a Bengal on a raft ought to get some sort of trophy. The Academy — however wrong it may be with its nominations — will reward Ang Lee as such.