We're so connected these days. I know my middle school girlfriend's 4th kid's name (great work on the potty training, Cameron). I know what my freshman dorm suite mate ate for lunch today (fish tacos!). I can even see what celebrities like Kobe Bean Bryant are doing after a win (glad you joined the TwitterVerse Mamba!).
Thanks to social media, we don't have to leave our desk (or our bed for you iPad users) to see what everyone who was/is/will be in our lives is doing at any second of the day. Sometimes, it's pretty interesting. But like anything in life, there are some people who abuse their privilege and violate social media common courtesy. Oh yes, you know who I'm talking about: You're on your lunch break, scrolling through your feed, and you see that one post that makes you want to take your company-issued 2003 Dell laptop and launch it across the room.
Below I've shared a list of some of the biggest offenders that we all hate to see and dared to say what everyone else wants to say.
1. TODAY IS MY FRIDAY!!!!!! :)
No. Actually, today is your Thursday. It is also everyone's Thursday. Just because you have a 3-day weekend ahead of you doesn't mean you get to dictate what day of the week it is. Besides, the rest of the normal working world has to work tomorrow and hates you for having the day off and bragging about it.
2. Any picture of a girl's knees and an empty beach in the background.
We get it. You're at the beach and its a Wednesday. You know why we know? Because for the last week you've been posting a running countdown of "Days until I hit the beach :) <3 <3". And please, don't make the comment on this picture "Not a bad view for a Wednesday."
3. Any Facebook status with a hashtag in it.
Maybe you don't understand the purpose of a hashtag. It's intended for other social media avenues like Instagram and Twitter so people can follow trends that they enjoy. You know what it does for you on Facebook? #Absolutely #nothing, except make you look like an uninformed social media user.
4. The "Over Hash Tagger" #overit #love #blogging #blogfun #hashtag ##
We get it, you want to get as many double click "Loves" on Instagram as possible. But doesn't it freak you out that people you will never know are looking at and "loving" your picture?
5. Anything that's tagged as #NoFilter
You aren't a professional photographer. It's an iPhone. It does all the focusing for you.
6. "I can't believe this guy in the gym has his towel on one machine, his water on another and is using another. What does he think, he owns the gym?"
You know what people did in the gym before cell phones existed? They lifted weights and ran on treadmills. You know what happened when someone was using multiple machines? You walked up to said person and asked to work in some time with the machine around him or her. Hey, Mr./Mrs. Cell Phone User in the Gym, right now there's someone looking at you thinking how ridiculous you look on the phone in the gym. Leave it in your locker, Ari Gold.
7. "I love my baby so much" immediately followed by said "baby" liking the status.
We all know you're laying in bed or hanging on the couch together. The world knows you love each other because your "Relationship Status" doesn't say "It's Complicated." Do us all a favor and turn to "baby" and tell him/her "I love you, baby." If you're afraid to do that, text him/her.
8. Any picture of food.
Everyone eats. You know what that food is going to be in 4-8 hours? Poop. Yep. Please don't take a picture of that and post it.
9. The "In-Game Play by Play" posts. "Oh did you just see that dunk?!?!" "That pass was ridiculous" "LeBron is better than Jordan, no question"
We're all watching the same game. You're actually missing part of it while typing what you just saw. No one actually cares to hear your commentary on a sporting event. If they did, they'd send you a text or call you to talk about it. Chill out John Madden.
10. An Instagram picture that is literally just words.
3 choices here. Type that quote on Facebook. Type that quote on Twitter. Post a cool picture, then post that with the quote under it on Instagram. Stop filling up my damn Instagram feed with words!