Police Chief Mike Berkemeier of Laurelville, Ohio got things a little mixed up a few weeks ago when his munchies arrived long before he was drugged beyond belief. He returned from visiting his elder daughter in the hospital after a traffic accident, and suddenly had a hankering for something sweet.
So when the exhausted Berkemeier found a cake on the counter, he did what any of us would: He helped himself.
To the whole thing.
Inexplicably, he began to feel very strange.
"All I can describe it as is that it was the worst feeling in the world," he said. "I thought I was dying."
Berkemeier's munchies had led to something else entirely. Apparently, his younger daughter's friend had asked to leave the cake in the house earlier in the day. Harmless, right?
Not when the cake is laced with cannabis oil. In other words, it was a weed cake. Like weed brownies, or any baked good laced with cannabis, you need to be careful how much you eat — too much can lead to dire consequences, especially if you've never taken the drug before.
This police chief, having just eaten an entire cake laced with cannabis, drove his miserable self to the police station, which was closer than the hospital and the only place he could think of to go.
From there, an ambulance transported him to the hospital, where doctors performed a battery of tests. They had no idea what was wrong, until Berkemeier's fiancée received a phone call from the daughter with the cannabis-happy friend.
He described it as an almost "House"-like epiphany: "My fiancée hung up the phone and called for the nurse and said, 'Get a nurse here right away. I know what it is.'"
Berkemeier was successfully treated for his excessive THC consumption and released from the hospital after two days.
"It was probably the scariest thing that has ever happened to me in my entire life," he said.
Hopefully, Berkemeier has learned to avoid eating entire cakes in one sitting. Or that he should leave his daughter's things alone. Or maybe, his daughter has learned never to trust her friend again. The moral of this wacky story is probably some combination of these factors.
Just one week until 4/20, people — stay safe!