When you're a kid thinking about how it's going to be when you get older, you have a lot of big dreams and expectations. You know exactly how you're going to be as an adult and what your fabulous life will be like. Then one day you wake up and reality comes crashing down like a structurally unsound construction site, but it's not all bad. Well, it could be worse. Well, there's wine. So, that's something.
Here are a few major differences between what we thought we were getting and what the FedEx of life dropped off at our door:
We thought it would be like:
But then it was more like:
Carrie probably had brass knuckles in her drawer too, right?
No school ever again!
But then, as soon as we get outside we're right back up against the glass:
I feel like this fox just gets my life.
We thought growing up meant going out every night …
But now we do our new favorite thing: staying home watching Project Runway.
We’re making [adulthood] work.
We do classy things.
In a relative sense.
Any situation is classy if you add scotch. Speaking of which …
We can get drunk all the time!
Especially since these days it only takes 3 drinks.
We really looked forward to staying up late …
We didn’t realize we would be working.
Why else would you be up at this hour?
We have complete independence!
… except from our friends, parents, boss, landlord, and mobile phone company.
Please send help.
We look super hot …
Because we found the one thing we look good in and bought 12.
Too tired for choices.
Expectation: eating all the pizza you want and no one needs to know.
Reality: eating all the pizza you want and no one needs to know. And it is delicious.