During the endless escapades of Miley Cyrus last year, many commenters repeatedly begged, "Where is her father?" in hopes that an intervention from Billy Ray Cyrus would reel in his twerking daughter.
After seeing his newest video, it appears there's no hope. We can't say that Larry King didn't warn us via Twitter back in December that this hip-hop version of "Achy Breaky Heart" was coming, but there was no way to anticipate just how awful it is.
Teaming with Dionne Warwick's son Buck 22 (he actually goes by this) for an alien-infested reworking of Cyrus' international hit song "Achy Breaky Heart," Miley's dad seems eager to outdo his daughter in terms of musical wrong turns. While the hip-hop country mashup of Florida Georgia Line and Nelly cruised its way to monster single status, this attempt at crossing genre lines goes way too far south.
The clip begins with a Larry King cameo breaking the news of a UFO over eastern Kentucky, then quickly transitions to the abduction of Billy Ray and Buck onto a spaceship full of scantily-clad female aliens who make Miley's VMA outfit choice look prudish. Mixing perfunctory EDM production with Pitbull-worthy beats and Cyrus' classic country hook, Buck also peppers the track with dumb lyrical non sequiturs like, "I'd rather be lucky than good." And through it all, the aliens are equal parts disturbing and idiotic.
Maybe Bangerz wasn't the most eloquent and polished pop album of last year, but Miley looks like a genius compared to the goofy pandering of this rework. When Buck and Billy namecheck her with the predictable "Miley keeps twerking" line and a "Wrecking ball!" ad-lib, it seems like a transparent attempt to tack her fame onto their miserable mashup. It also seems like the worst parenting ever.
But what's even worse — "Achy Breaky Heart" was a great song, and this version will ruin the 1992 original forever.