With the party conventions and the 2012 presidential elections inching closer and closer, the media has been reporting on the constantly changing horse race between former Governor Romney and President Obama in great detail with weekly national polls, petty arguments between the candidates, and the vetting of each other’s pasts. Fed up with this coverage and the lack of attention to the real issues facing America, Obama and Romney have stunned the country today in announcing to join their campaigns and run together.
According to reliable sources within the administration, President Obama will make the official announcement tomorrow, telling reporters that Romney approached him about joining forces.
“The governor told me that he is sick of the division in the country and bickering over pointless, inconsequential issues. And in order to bring the country together and increase bipartisanship, we are joining forces,” the president told reporters over the weekend. “Romney will, of course, run as my Veep,” Obama continued to chuckles from the press, “but I am absolutely thrilled to have his advice, guidance, and counsel.”
Since both Obama and Romney agree on almost every substantial and important issue, especially those with which a president has power over, rumors of joining campaigns have been circulating inside the Beltway for weeks. And top members of Congress, excited to finally move forward without gridlock, couldn’t be more thrilled.
“I congratulate Romney and Obama for putting the interests of the country ahead of partisan fighting,” Senator Lindsey Graham (R-S.C.) said. “Their support for the NDAA bill, for torture, and the lack of concern for archaic notions of civil liberties shows that Washington is truly dedicated to fighting terrorism,” Graham added.
Senator John McCain (R-Ariz.) sounded youthful as ever, saying, "I have applauded Obama’s willingness to use military intervention around the globe in Pakistan, Yemen, Somalia, Libya, and Syria. And with Romney’s promises to increase the military budget by $8 trillion, Iran is next.” McCain spoke as he had his arm around Senator Joe Lieberman (I-Conn.).
Chairman of the Federal Reserve Ben Bernanke was also visibly excited, but showed a calm demeanor as he heaped praised on Obama and Romney.
“Instead of bickering over emotionally powerful, but minor, issues, we have two statesmen joining forces to allow the Fed to have unaccountable power to print money, bailout banks and politically-favored industries, devalue the currency, and manipulate interest rates,” Bernanke said as he left his office on Sunday.
In response to this display of bipartisanship, Congressman Ron Paul has decided to run against what he calls the “Republicrat” Party. Fed up with the treatment Paul and his supporters have received from the leaders of the Republican Party, Paul has formed his own coalition against the Obama-Romney move.
In an intimate interview with economist Jim Grant, Paul made a final plea to the American people: “My libertarian views are pretty well-known, but now I am running solely under the platform of peace and the Bill of Rights. They are the War Party, we are the Peace Party...disaffected Democrats, frustrated Republicans, independents, Greens, and anyone who values constitutional rule of law now have a voice,” Paul told Grant with a slight smile.
“Our coalition does not agree on everything, but we agree on what matters: and end to the American empire and a restoration of civil liberties.”
While the Obama-Romney campaign currently has about 60% support among the American people, Paul’s independent run has tremendous grassroots support and enthusiasm which should make this one of the most interesting presidential elections in recent memories.