If Lesbians Said the Stuff Straight People Say, Here's How Absurd It Would Sound

If Lesbians Said the Stuff Straight People Say, Here's How Absurd It Would Sound
Source: YouTube
Source: YouTube

Lesbians. Not only are we arguably the least cool group of the LGBTQ community, we are also roundly fetishized by straight men who want to test our sexual resolve and mockingly hit on by ill-informed, drunk or otherwise bored straight women.

BuzzFeed — which has recently come out with a series of videos highlighting the stereotypes associated with a variety of communities — is back with a new clip targeting the ridiculous things out and proud lesbians have to deal with on a regular basis. Check out their new role-reversal, "If Lesbians Said the Stuff Straight People Say," a witty, if a bit obvious, take on the annoying things straight people say to lesbians:


"You two are straight? Can I watch?" "Not to be heterophobic or anything..." "You're straight, but not like a straight stereotype" And maybe best of all, "Well, it's not like really sex, you know." If these statements seem absurd, just imagine how it actually feels to hear this kind of tired drivel day in and day out.

Essentially these questions reflect a continuing "lesbian Spanish Inquisition," primarily concerned with gender presentation, how lesbians have sex and if the myriad avenues for lesbian sexual intimacy constitute "real" sex in the minds of the straight questioners.

This last point, a seemingly constant issue for so many heteronormative people, implies that "real" sex depends entirely on the inclusion of a penis. Never mind that lesbians engage in, not to mention enjoy, penetration and, as science suggests, lesbians have more orgasms than straight men and, in many cases, straight women.

Other questions left out of the video but clearly necessary for any sequel: "Can I join?" "Can we join" and "You're too pretty to be straight!"


Image Credit: BuzzFeed via YouTube

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Marcie Bianco

Dr. Marcie Bianco is a Staff Writer at Mic, a Contributing Editor at Curve Magazine, and an adjunct associate professor at Hunter College. She has contributed to AfterEllen, Feministing, The Feminist Wire, The Huffington Post, Lambda Literary, XO Jane, and The Women’s Review of Books. She writes and lectures about ethics, from feminism to race relations. Her current writing projects include a manuscript about lesbian academic affairs and a collection of feminist essays.

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