Mo Brooks just lost his cherished Donald Trump endorsement for being “woke”

A schlemiel, it’s been famously said, is “the guy who spills soup;” while his counterpart, the schlimazel, is “the guy who he spills it on.” With all due respect to the Yiddish sages who crafted this perfect distillation of two very distinct types of hapless losers, I’d like to add a third entry into the mix: The Brooks, a guy who loudly complains about the sort of person who would spill soup, then immediately proceeds to spill soup all over himself.

On Wednesday morning, Mo Brooks, Alabama congressman and aspiring United States Senator, learned that his cherished electoral endorsement from former president Donald Trump had been unceremoniously withdrawn and would instead be bestowed upon one of his GOP primary opponents “in the near future.” Brooks, who less than one week earlier had released a pathetically groveling campaign ad that touted his role helping Trump foment the January 6 insurrection, was apparently just too damn “woke” for the former president’s liking.

That Trump would so viciously yank the rug out from under Brooks’s senatorial prospects is, in and of itself, pretty funny. Brooks is, after all, not only the dumbest man in Congress, but one of Trump’s most unscrupulously pathetic hangers on. As I write this, three hours after the rescinded endorsement, Brooks’s official campaign Twitter account still looks like this:

You know that scene in High Fidelity where John Cusack’s character is standing in the rain after he gets dumped, screaming like a maniac at his now-ex-girlfriend and vacillating between insulting her and pleading for reconciliation? I have to imagine that’s something akin to Brooks’s mental state this morning. Because, as predictable as Trump’s endorsement withdrawal is, the fact that he’d blame Brooks for succumbing to “let’s move beyond 2020-wokeness” is the sort of psyche shattering insult that would likely drive a fully MAGA-pilled doofus like Brooks into total hysterics.

But scratch beneath the surface a bit more, and Trump’s “woke” explanation for dropping Brooks like a hefty bag full of tomato soup seems more like an exercise in ass-covering from a man who is biologically incapable of allowing his name to be connected in any way with an electoral loser — especially one who, as Trump notes in his missive, blew a massive polling lead and is now running third behind his closest rivals. That Trump has such an impressive list of successful election endorsements under his belt is less about his ability to sway voters and more a byproduct of his commitment to selecting candidates who were likely in a position to win already. Dropping Brooks, regardless of any personal offense he might have taken at the congressman’s insistence that Republicans should move on from their 2020 defeat, is as much about juicing his endorsement numbers by pivoting away from a loser.

Whatever the case may be, Mo Brooks, a man dumb enough to have tweeted his email password to 100,000 followers, and who once blamed climate change on rocks getting wet, now has a new embarrassing feather to stick in his already overflowing cap. Good for him, I guess.